One guess who said this: [The legislators] cannot have the guts to come out there in front of you and say, ‘I don’t want to represent you. I want to represent those special interests: the unions, the trial lawyers’ … I call them girly-men. They should get back to the table and they should finish […]
365 Old Favorites that you didn’t know were Old or Favorite
Ubuweb relaunches (though I have to confess, I missed the initial launching) its 365 Days Project: 365 mp3s of crazy, eccentric, off-the-wall recordings. Wild and crazy stuff, like Casper The Friendly Ghost singing Motorcycle Policeman (yes, that Casper the Friendly Ghost), and Van Morrison singing songs called Ring Worm, You Say France And I Whistle, […]
Posted by Ben on July 21, 2004
https://www.swordbilled.com/ubuweb-365/
Scattershot: Dogs, Dogs, and Blobs
Wonder Dog? In Toronto, a dog may well have prevented a massacre. The dog—whose identity has yet to be confirmed (sounding more and more like a superhero)—approached a man who was planning a killing spree, thus defusing the situation. The man’s plan was to load his weapons and then drive around, killing at random, etc., […]
Posted by Ben on July 20, 2004
https://www.swordbilled.com/dogs-dogs-blobs/
Freak vending machine accident
Pretty much by definition, freak accidents don’t happen every day. Particularly freak accidents involving exploding vending machines that expel poisonous gas. Yes, freak accidents involving exploding vending machines that happen, through the wonders of happy coincidence, to produce something like phosgene gas (used in WWI as a chemical warfare agent)—these aren’t things that happen every […]
Posted by Ben on July 6, 2004
https://www.swordbilled.com/freak-vending-machine-accident/
Sexing Up The Book Industry
In what’s apparently some sort of publicity scam in England, Penguin (the publisher, not the animal) has launched a campaign in which a “sexy model” will roam the streets, looking for men (> 16 years) who happen to be reading the book-of-the-month. This so-called “Good Booking Girl” (honestly) will reward the male reader with £1,000. […]
Posted by Ben on June 19, 2004
https://www.swordbilled.com/sexing-up-the-book-industry/
True Story
“CHARLES WYCKOFF: Hello. KEVIN B. WYCKOFF: Hey, Dad. CHARLES: Huh. Well damn, boy. We just had your funeral today. KEVIN: Yeah I know, I heard. CHARLES: Well, what the hell is going on?“ (Harper’s, via MeFi)
Posted by Ben on June 5, 2004
https://www.swordbilled.com/true-story/
Voting Gloss off the Island
Falling into the “You Could Make This Up, But People Would Think You Were A Bit Slow In The Head” category: “Billed as the ‘ultimate reality TV show,’ British pay-channel UKTV Style promises a wall, some brushes and different types of paint in its program ‘Watching Paint Dry.’ “[P]eople watching paint drying on www.uktvstyle.co.uk will […]
Posted by Ben on May 28, 2004
https://www.swordbilled.com/voting-gloss-off-the-island/
A kangaroo named Lulu (and don’t forget the cockles!)
It’s enough to warms the cockles of your heart: “A kangaroo named Lulu is to receive a national bravery award after raising the alarm to save an Australian farmer knocked unconscious by a fallen tree branch. “Hobby farmer Leonard Richards was checking for storm damage on his property at Tanjil South, 150 km (93 miles) […]
Posted by Ben on May 21, 2004
https://www.swordbilled.com/a-kangaroo-named-lulu-and-dont-forget-the-cockles/
Gorillas in the midst
Crime-fighting Gorilla Dies. While the headline’s promising, the truth turns out to be maybe less than you’d hope for. So, instead of a gorilla being a normal gorilla by day and a crime-fighting superhero by night, we get instead the 440 lb Max who, when a gunman fleeing from a police chanced into his zoo […]
Posted by Ben on May 15, 2004
https://www.swordbilled.com/gorillas-in-the-midst/
Pee on us, it’s good for business!
Margaret D. Tutwiler, promoter of US image abroad, leaves her post for a Wall-Street job, dealing a blow to hopes of softening up America’s image in the Middle East; maybe we could advertise the USA on urinals. You think I’m joking? Well, with a winking, blinking urinal… who knows what good we might do at […]
Posted by Ben on May 4, 2004
https://www.swordbilled.com/pee-on-us-its-good-for-business/