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“This little website exists to spread some happiness all over the planet by sharing sounds. Most of these sounds are far from the mainstream, so you might just find something your ears have never experienced!”

With a name like Gatorama, it has to be good

Gatorama in Palmdale [FL] sells more than 15,000 pounds of alligator meat a year.

The famed roadside attraction is one of Florida’s original gator farms. Owners Allen and Patty Register not only sell raw gator meat, they also have a restaurant serving gator ribs and other specialties.

… Just in case visitors forget where they are, there’s a sign at Gatorama warning: “No swimming or sunbathing. Violators may be eaten.”

(AP: “Gator meat tastes more like pork than chicken” [September 27, 2004])

White Noise: The Movie?

Maybe it will happen, and maybe it won’t—but the point is, the very prospect of a White Noise movie is fantastic, if not a little daunting.

It’s one of those cases where you hope they don’t mess up (they being the director, screenwriters, actors, etc., etc.) , but where you also don’t quite know how they can’t, the original work being so grandly, inimitably magnificent in its own right.

In short: What is would-be director Barry Sonnenfeld* thinking?

But you gotta have hope, I suppose.

Note:
*: director of The Addams Family, Wild Wild West; cinematographer for Blood Simple, Throw Momma from the Train, & Big; producer for Out of Sight & The Ladykillers, etc.

(Movie Insider/Release: “Don DeLillo’s ‘White Noise’ Next for Barry Sonnenfeld” [July 30, 2004]; see also the IMDB page for White Noise (2005))

Icons of the Industry

Those talking M&M’s candy characters cleaned up, with 22 percent of more than 600,000 votes cast…

The AFLAC Duck — whose quack renders the insurance company’s name — finished second with 14 percent. Mr. Peanut pulled in 10 percent. The Pillsbury Doughboy and Tony the Tiger rounded out the Top 5, earning single-digit returns.

(CSM: “Madison Avenue crowns America’s ad icons,” by Clayton Collins [September 22, 2004])

Making a robotic elephant trunk is harder than you’d think

Were this lobster not made of industrial-strength plastic, metal alloys and a nickel metal hydride battery, Dr. Ayers … seemed frustrated enough to drop [it] into a boiling pot of water and serve it up for dinner.

Mr. Snakebot complains it’s hard to get funding these days. A maker of robotic flies—who happens professor at the University of California—laments the difficulty of making these robots: these flies, geckoes, fish. And the RoboLobster? Don’t get me started.

What is the world coming to. Six-legged robots “inspired” by cockroaches have their own websites. So does CMU’s snakerobot. And Berkley’s MechoGecko.

Read of these things, so that you might be forewarned.

(It’s not necessarily what you’d call an inspired article, but it has its moments.)

(NYT: “They’re Robots? Those Beasts!” by Scott Kirsner [September 17, 2004])

What Mistakes?

GRABEL: President Bush, during the last four years, you have made thousands of decisions that have affected millions of lives. Please give three instances in which you came to realize you had made a wrong decision, and what you did to correct it. Thank you.

BUSH: I have made a lot of decisions, and some of them little, like appointments to boards you never heard of, and some of them big.

And in a war, there’s a lot of — there’s a lot of tactical decisions that historians will look back and say: He shouldn’t have done that. He shouldn’t have made that decision. And I’ll take responsibility for them. I’m human.

But on the big questions, about whether or not we should have gone into Afghanistan, the big question about whether we should have removed somebody in Iraq, I’ll stand by those decisions, because I think they’re right.

BUSH: That’s really what you’re — when they ask about the mistakes, that’s what they’re talking about. They’re trying to say, “Did you make a mistake going into Iraq?” And the answer is, “Absolutely not.” It was the right decision.

The Duelfer report confirmed that decision today, because what Saddam Hussein was doing was trying to get rid of sanctions so he could reconstitute a weapons program. And the biggest threat facing America is terrorists with weapons of mass destruction.

We knew he hated us. We knew he’d been — invaded other countries. We knew he tortured his own people.

On the tax cut, it’s a big decision. I did the right decision. Our recession was one of the shallowest in modern history.

Now, you asked what mistakes. I made some mistakes in appointing people, but I’m not going to name them. I don’t want to hurt their feelings on national TV. (emphasis added)

It’s actually a pretty straightforward question: name 3 mistakes you’ve made, and tell us how you’ve tried to fix them.

Never mind strategy, or political technique, or the subtleties of debate: if Bush truly thought he didn’t make any mistakes, his answer should have been fairly straightforward: “I don’t believe I’ve made any mistakes.”

He then could have gone on to defend what other people view as mistakes, and then explain why they weren’t mistakes, thus defending his original point (I haven’t made any mistakes).

Curiously, that’s not what he says.

Instead of actually coming out and stating that he hasn’t made any mistakes, he addresses the question implicitly. Or vaguely. Or something.

The point is, the person asking the question requested three mistakes.

Bush offered three items.

Since he didn’t state from the get-go that he hasn’t made any mistakes, one reasonable conclusion to draw is that he has made mistakes, and knows it, in one way or another.

Taking this at face value—which, admittedly, is a stretch (bear with me)—there are three things Bush mentions, and defends. He offers three things, and the question asked for three mistakes.

Is it too much to presume that the three things he offers (Afghanistan, Iraq, taxes) were in fact three mistakes he’s made?

Just a thought.

(hat tip to Orcinus for the debate snippet; the whole segment is available at MSNBC)

But how will the writers vote?

Slate asked a variety of prominent American novelists, ranging from Edwidge Danticat to John Updike, for a frank response to the following question: Which presidential candidate are you voting for, and why? Thirty-one novelists participated, with four for Bush, 24 for Kerry, and three in a category of their own.

Dan Chaon, Amy Tan, John Updike, Jonathan Safran Foer, Rick Moody, Joyce Carol Oates, Orson Scott Card, Diane Johnson, Jonathan Franzen, Judith Guest, Edwidge Danticat, Chang-Rae Lee, Jane Smiley, Lorrie Moore, Robert Ferrigno, Jennifer Egan, Russell Banks, Daniel Handler, Roger L. Simon, George Saunders, Jodi Picoult, A.M. Homes, Thomas Mallon, Gary Shteyngart, Jim Lewis, Vendela Vida, David Amsden, Elizabeth Hardwick, Nicole Krauss, Richard Dooling and Thomas Beller weigh in.

A few of the choicest morsels (in my opinion):

“I’ll vote for John Kerry. His election won’t reverse our nation’s rush to establish a fascist plutocracy, it’s too late for that.” (Russell Banks)

“Richard Nixon, because I found him so fascinating the first time around I’d be curious to see what he could do from the beyond…?” (A.M. Homes)

“Mark me on the Bush side of the ledger, a lonely side for this survey, I’m certain. Most novelists live in their imagination, which is a fine place to be until the bad guys come knock knock knocking. … Kerry will dance the Albright two-step with Kim Jong-il, consult with Sandy Berger’s socks, and kowtow to the U.N. apparatchiks who have done such a fine job of protecting the Cambodians, Rwandans, and the Sudanese. No thanks. No contest.” (Robert Ferrigno)

“Are there really any novelists voting for Bush?” (Lorrie Moore)

(Slate: “Roll Call” [October 11, 2004])

The Mysterious Disappearing Handball Team

Sri Lanka is trying to solve the mysterious disappearance of its “national handball team” while on tour in Germany, but it is no easy task — the Indian Ocean island doesn’t have one.

The 23-strong “team” managed to dupe the German Embassy in Colombo into issuing visas for a month-long tour beginning on September 8, acting German Ambassador Heidi Jung said on Thursday.

“There is no handball federation in Sri Lanka… We don’t even have a single club,” said Hemasiri Fernando, president of Sri Lanka’s Olympic Association.

(Reuters: “Mystery as ‘Handball Team’ Vanishes” [local version] [September 16, 2004])

What you don’t see every day:

That’s right, fashion models rapelling down the world’s tallest skyscraper.

Not down the entire building, mind you; but 154ft is still 154ft, and much more vertical than your typical catwalk.

(Also: not that you were going to argue against the building technically being the world’s tallest or not, but supposing for the moment that you were, there’s this:

A global architectural group on Friday declared the Taipei 101 skyscraper in Taiwan’s capital the world’s tallest building.

I thought you should know.)

(Reuters: “Models Use Tallest Skyscraper for Vertical Catwalk” [local version] [September 24, 2004]; CBC/CP: “Architects name Taipei 101 skyscraper the world’s tallest building” [October 10, 2004])

It’s true

Not that you’re ever going to be on the O’Reilly Factor (which as everyone who’s anyone knows, you simply call The Factor), but if you are, you’d better read up first. Seriously. Jack Shafer has a few good tips.

(Slate: “How To Beat Bill O’Reilly: Kill him with kindness,” by Jack Shafer [September 23, 2004])